Bathroom Hunters Male Edition: the best places to “go” on campus (no, I’m not kidding)
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Carson Myers, Staff Writer
I’ve been a writer for The Vision Online since January of 2016. As this year draws to a close, I am reminiscing on all the articles I’ve written and how I’ve developed my craft. I’ve written on a variety of topics ranging from political theory to lifestyle features. However, I would like to give my fellow students some practical, personal advice: I want to tell you where the best restrooms are on NGU’s campus. If it lands my reputation in the toilet, then so be it.
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Option One: Upstairs in Avery/Wood
There are two men’s and two women’s restrooms located outside the upstairs library doors and centered between a row of classrooms.
Pros: These are individual restrooms which set the standard for privacy. The four secluded thrones sit ensconced in a small enclave which limits outside noise and distraction.
Cons: The luxurious nature of these commodes has been recognized by many NGU students, making them prime real estate. Be prepared to wait if you visit between classes.
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Option Two: Upstairs in Donnan
There are expansive men’s and women’s restrooms at the top of the stairway in the Donnan Administration building.
Pros: Located in one of NGU’s oldest academic buildings, these established toilets have become a mainstay for students and faculty alike. Frosted glass windows cast warm, natural light on the porcelain palaces while giving a feel of privacy. These restrooms are large, spacious and are outfitted with state-of-the-art exhaust fans to disguise any unpleasant noises.
Cons: These restrooms contain stalls which offer less privacy than individual toilets like those in Avery/Wood.
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Option Three: Turner Chapel Lobby
The lobby of Turner chapel is replete with large men’s and women’s restrooms.
Pros: When not in use, these restrooms are a respite for weary bowels. The clean, well-appointed spaces are modern and sophisticated featuring the latest in plumbing technology.
Cons: These restrooms are very busy before, during and after chapel services. If you feel something moving and it’s not the Spirit, be prepared to share these facilities with the rest of the student body.
Have you made your decision? We all know the best bathroom is the one at home, but college students have to make do. In addition to this comprehensive guide, download the toilet finder app on your smartphone. This app allows users to locate public restrooms and give them a rating based on their experience.
The next time nature beckons, you can be a little more prepared.
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